The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDelete#26 Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to their rescue forever. When I have to talk to parents about their child's behavior, they often have excuses to why their child is having behaviors or they think their child did not to do the behavior I have talked with them about. It's important that students are held accountable for their actions/behaviors and their parents hold them to that as well.
#30 Don't get your kid a video game system unless you are ready to be a prison guard. I have a lot of students that play video games and that's all that they do. They are missing out on experiences that they can experience such as playing in the snow, playing games with their family, and playing with neighbors. When I ask students what they did on the weekend, a lot of them will say that they played video games.
#26 Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to the rescue forever. This section stands out to me as reflecting how many to most of todays parents respond. Clark makes the argument that many of the situation he explained sound ridiculous, but when it's your own child, things look a lot different and we protect. As a parent, I have been there and that does make sense to say. Clark says to please stop raising soft children and he equates this as to why so many 25-34 year olds still live with their parents. Parents need to let their children take punishments which teaches lessons and builds character. There are too many helicopter parents in todays culture which hinder rather than aid in their students development.
ReplyDelete#29 NIp it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems. I believe the culture of our schools, the collective habits of its' teachers, and the appropriate actions by parents combine to develop the essential social skills and attitudes of the youth. By allowing disrespect, it can easily become habitual and ingrained. More parents, teachers and schools need to become more consistent in handling this, as I believe this is a problem that faces our world ever more. Teaching respect and manners keeps student on the right paths.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDelete1. "Realize the power of gratitude and appreciation" - I think this one for me is a reminder to the teachers that have helped me. I love when a child thanks me or shares something significant they have taken away from a lesson. I need to do that myself with those that have mentored me. It really helps you to see the difference you have made.
2. "remind the children of their blessing and stress the value of a strong work ethic"- This one because sometimes I forget to remind them of all their skills and blessings- It is not always about the score, but how hard they have worked for it.
29. Nip it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems. I think parents really have to watch small behaviors especially learned helplessness that can snowball downhill into huge issues over time if they’re not caught. I can also see these in my own kids and I have to get on them.
ReplyDelete33. Be patient. Every kid grows through things on their own schedule. It’s messy. Keep talking to them. Be there. Be present. Be kind. Model good behavior. Model what you want them to be someday. We are making men and women, but they need something to see to grow into. And it’s so hard to be patient. We have to keep going toward the light ourselves when some of us didn’t have a light to follow. But we’re trying to show the kids better things than we had.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why?
ReplyDelete- Nip it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems.
- Realize that even very good children will lie.
Both of these are HUGE - I have to say that contacting parents is one of the worst parts of my job. I avoid it as much as possible! The parents of the students are sometimes the worst people I come across in this profession. Highly unprofessional adults, and enablers of their students' bad behaviors. No boundaries and no consequences which exacerbates the things we then deal with at school. Who am I to tell a student "No, you may not xyz" when they've never been told No at home? Of course they will throw a tantrum and blame me. It's always worked at home. Extremely frustrating.
For the parents of my classroom: #31 Show them how to study; don't expect it to come naturally. I wish more parents would take the time to help their kids, to learn with them, to study with them. I wish I would quit hearing, "I already passed the 4th grade" or "I can't do that math, it's not how I learned." Don't make excuses and stick your kid with no support. Help them, try to learn, reach out to me and ask for help. Also, parents who have students that struggle reading, yet spend zero time practicing with their child at home. I have a reading log to document what the students read. The students that struggle the most come back with empty logs every month.
ReplyDeleteFor myself, #33 Be Patient. I wish I had more patience with my own kids. After long days at school I feel as though I have run out of patience for my own family. I need to remember to take a deep breath, slow down, spend the time with them, helping them learn and grow. I need to let go of my control and have the patience for them to learn to do things correctly, so I don't get stuck with the task.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDelete1) "Don't be a helicopter parent - you can't come to their rescue forever." Good golly i wish we could send this out weekly/monthy to parents!! This is such an important educational statement - perhaps more now than ever. Ron points out that parents love their children sometimes so fiercely that they become unwilling to allow their children to fail or make mistakes. What the parents are not realizing is that from those small failures/mistakes comes the growth that their student needs in order to learn how to be successful. I giggled a bit when he states that by "coddling" their children we've created a society of young adults who still live at home because they never did learn the necessary skills to "figure things out" on their own. A strikingly accurate statement.
2) "See the potential in every child." This one is my favorite. It is vitally important to the overall success of a child to feel like their teachers love, support and care about them. This has to be done for every student - not just the easy ones. EVERY student deserves to have their teachers see the potential inside of them. I believe this is the most difficult & challenging aspect of being a teacher.
#29: Nip it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems. It doesn't seem like a big deal that a student starts coming to class later and later after the bell has rang, but it is. The student is walking into class saying "I'm here. What ware we doing?", and in turn disrupting the class. Not to mention they have been marked absent by me, creating more work for me to tell the office now that they are in fact at school and just late.
ReplyDelete#30: Don't get your kid a video game system unless you are ready to be a prison guard. I have a student that all of the teachers have been concerned about since 1st grade (I have him this year in 3rd). The parents listen when we tell them the concerns (academic, and lack of ability to focus). Well over this year I have learned that this is in large part to he only video games outside of school, has no routine, and has no bedtime. This is very scary and concerning!
As a parent I most needed to hear #27: Realize the power of gratitude and appreciation. I got so caught up in making sure they are doing a good job academically, and socially. I also am ensuring they get to practice, appointments, and complete homework that I forget to show appreciation towards them.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDeleteThe statement that folks/parents in my district need to hear the most is "Nip it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems." I think we let things go and hope it gets better. Parents then have created a huge problem with full blown battles, screaming matches and more that didn't have to get to that point. If we focus on the little things when our kids are young and more impressionable, the big things may never appear. When things get out of our control it is really difficult to full it back. Behaviors start small.
The other statement that I wish parents in my district would take nore of is "Don't get your kid a video game system unless you are ready to be a prison guard." Parents will tell me that they can't get their kid to do their homework or they can't get their kid to sleep. More often than not, video games are to blame. There are so many problems that start with the purchase of that system. But this is an incredibly difficult challenge for parents to say not to. Its fun. There can be a few benefits with coordination as well. Some games can be "infortainment." Its a very important battle, though and one that needs to be won by the parents.
As a parent, the one I need to hear the most is "Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to their rescue forever." This is so hard. Its hard to watch your kids struggle and not feel the strong pull to bail them out. It's incredibly necessary. Humans need to be able to problem solve and if we never give them that opportunity, we are setting them and ourselves up for heartache.
#26 Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to their rescue forever. I feel like so many parents don't back the teachers anymore and the students know that. Everything automatically becomes the teachers fault and the parents will "fix" whatever needs to be fixed. I have had many parents ask if there are extra credit opportunities to make grades higher. They have also asked if their child can redo assignments so they can get a higher grade, the students fail to tell the parents they had already "redone" the assignment and it is the best grade they will get. Parents realize that I have given as much grace as possible and there is no "saving" that the parents can do.
ReplyDelete#31 Show them how to study; don't expect it to come naturally. I feel like this is huge because so many students have never been taught how to study or have found the best method for themselves to study. Throughout the school year I try to expose my students to as many study techniques as possible and encourage students to bring ideas to the classroom that helps them so they can maybe help someone else. Parents are not as present around their children these days as they once were. This is so beneficial and will carry into so much farther in life like high school and college. I remember going to college and some people were having to figure out how to study for the first time in their life, this made college more challenging for them. If we can help students avoid this that would be incredible.
The parents of my students need to hear #30- Don't get them a video game system. I truly believe this! I see so many kids that just want to get done to play a computer game, or I hear about kids that are just on their phone after school. I am NOT a proponent for video games... at all. I hear too many things from 1st graders to HS age students about what they've seen on video games and NONE of it is good. I think video games are a waste of time.
ReplyDeleteI need to remember #33 to be patient with my own kids. Both of my kids are now college age, and I DO need to be more patient with them. I have found that the more they address and solve problems on their own, the more the 'lesson' truly sticks.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDeleteDon't get your kid a video game system unless you are ready to be a prison guard. I made this mistake with my own child. He promised he would limit his playing to one hour a day, and the next thing I knew he was hooked. It took action and limited his use after his grades and attitude became unmanageable. I was able to help him get back to a balance in his life.
Nip it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems. I do not let problems get out of hand. I contact the parents if I have a problem after I cool down. I want them to hear from me before the issue has become worse.
Two statements that stood out to me were #34 “See the potential in every child” and #33 “Be patient.” Both are incredibly important in Early Childhood Special Education, where growth can look different for every child and progress may happen in small, steady steps rather than big leaps.
ReplyDeleteThe statement my families most need to hear is “See the potential in every child.” I sometimes notice parents feeling frustrated, discouraged, or even hopeless about their child’s progress. Others may unintentionally lower expectations because they focus more on delays than strengths. When families truly see their child as capable and full of potential, it shifts the entire dynamic—expectations rise, encouragement increases, and children often respond positively to that belief. Pairing this with patience is essential, as meaningful growth takes time. Helping families recognize both the potential and the process can empower them to support their child with hope and confidence. I also need to follow this statement as a parent.
ReplyDeleteThe Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
#26- Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to their rescue forever. I think this is one statement that parents really need to hear (myself included).
Our students have to learn to figure things out on their own, and making mistakes is one way to learn. The cheating example that Ron brings up is such a teachable moment for the student; however, the mother makes excuses for him and tries to "save" him from his punishment. The student would learn so much more if his parents also held him accountable.
#28-Remind children of their blessing and stress the value of a strong work ethic.
I am a huge believer in hard work. I think hard work will get you far. Teaching our students (and my own children) the importance of hard work is something that I really focus on. I love Ron's example of the jackets. How he tied in hard work and appreciation. I think that is something that as teachers and parents we can do. Encourage our kids to work hard for something that they may want, because then they will appreciate that thing/item so much more.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDeleteIn my community, I think many of the parents would benefit from hearing #26: Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to their rescue forever. I think the students in my area are very privileged. Many are not required to get jobs and told to focus on sports or fine arts. However, generally when one of these students gets in trouble and there is a consequence, many of these parents will attempt to intervene to get there student off the hook. It's insane. My parents would have never done this. I know this because they definitely didn't do this for me when I got a consequence. Taking accountability and responsibility is a trait that we have to teach our children and if the parents don't have this trait, who will teach them?
As a parent, number 30: Don't get your kid a video game system unless you are ready to be a prison guard. Although it's not a video game system, a cell phone is a close second in this situation. I like giving my teen the freedom she deserves and needs, but at the same time, teaching healthy balances is necessary.
The first statement I chose was "they need to work hard and push themselves." Helping the student succeed or giving them excuses is only hurting the student. Rigor in our school systems is lacking because you have to many people on different agendas. Some that just want to pass the student through and others with expectations. I also agree with Joe when he stated, "some administrators and teachers just want to ignore or brush the behaviors, problems away." It's hard to work under a system when Johnny got by with not completing homework and the next year it is expected. I also like how he said to believe the teacher. Everyone wants to hear each person's side of the story.
ReplyDeleteNumber 29 is the next statement I chose. Nip it in the bud; small issues can grow into big problems. A parent has to back the teacher and believe what they say. Also, when a behavior plan is made and they agree to it, it is not the teacher's fault when the student doesn't follow the plan. Here again the teacher should have the backing of at least the administration without question. If the student gets away with it once it will happen again. Behavior is a learned behavior and must be addressed at a young age.
I found it challenging to choose just two statements, but I want to focus on these: "Don't get your kid a video game system unless you are ready to be a prison guard" and "Don't be a helicopter parent." I feel that both of these carry important lessons for parents of high school students. The first statement highlights the responsibility that comes with giving students access to certain privileges. At the high school level and certainly prior to, students are still developing critical thinking and impulse control, their brains are simply not developed. A video game system, isn’t just that anymore, it means access to social media and online networks and comes with layers of responsibility that many adolescents are not yet ready to navigate independently. It is not just about the games themselves but the social connections, exposure, and influences that come along with them. Parents need to be intentional, set boundaries, and maintain open communication about safety and use. Practicing these conversations now helps students learn to manage freedom responsibly as they transition to adulthood and is incredibly important. The second statement about helicopter parenting is something I feel is particularly relevant for high school families. Our work is to prepare students to live independently, advocate for themselves, and solve problems. When parents step in too quickly to shield students from challenges, they inadvertently limit opportunities for growth. High school students need space to practice communication, decision-making, and problem-solving, even if that means making mistakes along the way. Encouraging parents to step back, while staying supportive, allows students to develop resiliency and confidence that will be needed later in life. Each of the statements I chose reinforces the delicate balance between guidance and independence.
ReplyDelete#32: This statement of realizing that even very good children will sometimes lie, is a statement that I believe some of the parents of my students could hear. The reason for this is because often times some parents will claim that their child said this and that and xyz wasn't done, which causes more problems than needed. It's important for parents to understand that children can make mistakes and taking accountability and growing from it is what will truly make them succeed.
ReplyDelete#34: See the potential in every child. This is such a true statement because parents and other people can get caught up in the behaviors or low grades that their seeing time and time again from students. This can be an unhealthy pattern for everyone to have those internal thoughts about students who they may get more irritated or frustrated with more. If we're questioning what potential a student has, then we're not doing something right. Instead, we could be that safe place and comforting voice to that student where there is more than likely an underlying problem as to why they are engaging in certain behaviors. Being patient is something I needed to hear. Not just in terms of working with students but going through my first year in my first role as a school counselor. I'm not going to have all the answers, I'm not going to know everything and that's all okay. Patience and learning as I go will make all the difference in helping students, parents, etc. with any needs that should be met to help them succeed.
Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDeleteParents of current students need to hear #26-Don’t be a helicopter parent. You can’t come to their rescue forever. As a current high school teacher, I try and teach my students to be their own advocates. Mom and dad aren't here on a daily basis so as they are transitioning from childhood to teens to adulthood, students need to start being able to rescue themselves or live the situations they created on their own. Rescuing them makes them unable to rescue themselves when needed.
As a parent, I think statement " 31-Show them how to study; don’t expect it to come naturally." would be the statement I most need. As a teacher, I know how to study and I forget that maybe my own children who don't have me as a teacher might need some help in this area. My own children are very unique in how they "do school". One of them needs to study a lot because of some attention issues and anxiety while the other 2 hardly have to study yet. I have been able to use some of my techniques to help them study. The ability to study is becoming a lost art in the day and age of "Google It" or "look it up".
"Nip it in the bud, small issues can grow into big problems". There are a TON of behavioral problems at my school, most of it is caused by absence of parenting/lack of parenting. This in turn, turns into a HUGE ISSUE, where their kid is constantly getting in trouble , and in some circumstances, removed from our building and placed into a behavioral school. Even worse, some kids just don't show and end up dropping out. The parents at my school need to realize if they handle the small issues to begin with, there is a greater potential to avoid bigger problems.
ReplyDelete"Don't be a helicopter parent. You can't come to their rescue forever."
This is a tough one for me to hear- I am not a true "helicopter parent, but I am new to the parent community as I have young children (2 & 1). As time is passing I can feel myself getting more nervous about letting them "leave the nest and fly". I need to remind myself that they have to grow up and do things on their own at some point, and it will only help them thrive!
There were many great statements throughout this section of the book. The two that stood out to me were:
ReplyDelete#26 Don’t be a helicopter parent, you can’t come to their rescue forever. Please stop raising soft children. While incredibly difficult, we need to let our children fail. Failure as a child has a lot less severe consequences than failure as an adult. Everyone experiences failure throughout their lifetime, its how we learn and can motivate us to succeed. I truly believe that continually bailing your children out, while may help them temporarily, will do more damage in the long run. As a parent myself, I get it, it’s painful to watch your child fail but it is a necessary part of growing up.
#28 - Remind children of their blessings and stress the value of a strong work ethic. I think our society gets too caught up in comparing ourselves to those around us, rather than looking further and comparing ourselves to other parts of the world. We are so blessed to have the resources that we do. If my children find themselves jealous of something someone else has, I remind them that they need to work for it. I tell both my students and my children, ‘you can be many things in this world, lazy is not one of them.’ A strong work ethic is something that I believe is becoming more rare in this day and age. Having a strong work ethic will set a child apart from their peers.
Two statements that stood out to me were #26: Don’t be a helicopter parent and #32: Realize that even very good children will sometimes lie. Both of these ideas are important because they deal with responsibility, independence, and helping students grow into mature young adults. Both also involve building trust and responsibility amongst all the stakeholders.
ReplyDeleteOf the two, #26 is the statement many parents of current students most need to hear. As a high school teacher and coach, it is clear that students benefit most when they are allowed to handle challenges, mistakes, and consequences on their own with guidance rather than constant rescue. Parents naturally want to protect their children, but if they step in every time something becomes uncomfortable, students can miss opportunities to develop resilience, problem-solving skills, and accountability. High school is an important stage where students need to learn how to advocate for themselves, communicate with adults, and respond to setbacks in a productive way.
Statement #32 is also valuable because it reminds parents to stay realistic and objective. Even students who are respectful, hardworking, and generally trustworthy can still make poor decisions or be dishonest at times. That does not make them bad kids, it simply means they are still learning and growing. Sometimes parents are quick to hear only one side of a story and immediately form an opinion before gathering all of the facts. In those situations, restraint and patience are important before reacting or placing blame. Taking time to hear every perspective often leads to a clearer understanding of what actually happened and allows adults to respond more fairly and effectively. Growth often begins when adults are willing to hold students accountable while still supporting them.
#33 Be Patient: My oldest daughter is in 2nd grade, my next daughter is in kindergarten and my youngest son is not yet in school. I have been helping the two girls with homework and being patient can be difficult. The patience I need is to let them work through the problems without help. I have a strong impulse to help them solve their math problems when I know I need to stand to the side and let them work out the solutions themselves. We are wired to want to help our children and seeing them struggle to find the answer can be agonizing but I am making an effort to sit patiently and let them complete their work without help with me in a supervisory role, only correcting them if they make a mistake and having them redo the problem
ReplyDelete#30 Don't Get Your Kid a Gaming System!!!: Excessive playing of video games is harmful for children. The games are so engaging that they have taken the place of real-world experiences and curiosity. All of Mr. Clark's concerns in this chapter have been documented by researchers. My opposition to video games goes beyond the harm they do to a student's academics. Kids who play video games excessively lose their desire to engage in real world activities. They don't wish to play sports, engage in outdoor activities such as hiking/hunting/fishing etc. They do not develop meaningful friendships with friends in their school and community but have online "friends" that they never see or interact with face-to-face. It is true that many kids play video games in moderation without suffering academically and socially. Like Clark points out, however, the parent essentially becomes a prison guard and if a child is particularly drawn to video games, the frequent arguments and desire to game can ruin a relationship. There will be no video games in our household and no smart phones until high school.
The Role of the Parent in the Success of the Child: Choose two of the 12 statements (#25-36) to discuss. Which of these statements do parents of your current students most need to hear? Why? If you are a parent yourself, which of these statements did you most need to hear?
ReplyDelete#28 Remind children of their blessings and stress the values of a strong work ethic. I pick #28 specifically for stressing the value of a strong work ethic. I feel too many students struggle with completing assignments in a timely fashion or even at all. Also, I have students that just rush through the assignment and make very silly errors. If the parents could stress and demonstrate the value of a strong work ethic, along with demonstrating a job to be proud of, in the home I believe things would be a lot different at school. When I was a student all I wanted to do was to make my parents and teachers proud. A lot of students seem to lack that need to make someone proud of them.
#35 Punctuate the power of words. I picked #35 Punctuate the power of words. First of all, to often on social media adults and kids alike air everything that's on their minds. I really feel this is a terrible idea and can easily cause really big issues. People aren't afriad to publicly call others out and absolutely destroy them or their businesses behind keyboard. Whatever happened to talking things out face-to-face and coming to an agreement or resolution together. I always told my kids that if they posted something publicly to make sure that their Grandma would approve :)